SUPER ENGLISH.... Enjoy!!

In Tamilnadu, there is a well known person by name, Mr. Jeppiar , Chairman of Sathyabama university and other self financing colleges, always speaks in English. The college students have collected & published a book by the name "Jeppiar ' s Spoken English"

Now , here are some classic English sentences from the great "Jeppiar ' s Spoken English"

# At the ground: 
All of you stand in a straight circle. 
There is no wind in the balloon. 
The girl with the mirror please comes here....{Means: girl with specs please come here).

# To a boy , angrily: 
I talk , he talk , why you middle middle talk?

# While punishing students: 
You , rotate the ground four times... 
You , go and under-stand the tree... 
Three of you stand together separately. 
Why are you late - say YES or NO ......(?)

# While addressing students about Dress Code: (he is very strict ABT this ) 
Every body should wear dress to college 
Boys no proplum 
Girls are pig proplum . (pig=big) 
Girls should wear only salwar no nitee. 
Girls should not wear T sirt , U shirt , V shirt.. But if you want to wear .... Remove it when inside the campus and put it out side the campus.

# Sir at his best: 
Sir had once gone to a film with his wife. By chance , he happened to see one of our boys at the theatre , though the boy did no t see them.
So the next day at school... (to that boy) - "Yesterday I saw you WITH MY WIFE at the Cinema Theatre"

# Sir at his best inside the Class room: 
Open the doors of the window. Let the atmosphere come in.
Cut an apple into two halves - I will take the bigger half.
Shhh...Quiet , boys...the principal JUST PASSED AWAY in the corridor
You , meet me behind the class. (Meaning AFTER the class..)
"Both of u three get out of the class." 
Open the doors of the window. Let the Air Force come in.
Close the doors of the windows please. I have winter in my nose today...
Take Copper Wire of any metal. Especially of Silver.....
Take 5 cm wire of any length.....

Last but not the least some Jeppiar experiences ....
Once Sir had come late to a college function , by the time he reached , the function had begun , so he went to the dais , and said , sorry I am late , because on the way my car hit 2 muttons (Meaning goats).

At Sathyabama college day 2002: 
"This college strict u the worry no ....
U get good marks , I the happy , tomorrow u get good job , jpr the happy , tomorrow u marry I the enjoy"

At St. Josephs college of engineering fresh years day 2003:
"No ragging this college. Anybody rag we arrest the police " 

VERY IMPORTANT: 
Enjoy this English, but don't forget your English..........

IBE_FB